Humanity has been engaged in a detailed study of sex, sexologists, and even British scientists. We have collected the funniest misconceptions of our ancestors!
“Where do children come from?” is a question worthy of heated debate not only in the sandbox, but also in the Roman forum! Of course, our ancestors thought a lot about this topic. Sometimes their thoughts turned into surprisingly ridiculous theories, which are very interesting to read from the height of our deep and fundamental knowledge today.
As an editorial board that tracks the latest trends in the modern science of love, we consider it our duty to also turn to the sources from time to time. Especially if you can dispel any misconceptions and myths along the way. Come on, dear reader, let’s turn around and dispel it immediately!
- A man’s temperament affects the sex of a child
In 335 BC, Aristotle (a surprisingly versatile man!) he formulated a curious theory about how a man’s temperament in bed affects the future sex of a child.
The ancient scientist believed that the main sexual property of a man is “heat”, while the main characteristic of a woman is “coldness”. If, during sex, the male “heat” manages to overcome the “coldness” of the woman, then a boy will be born as a result of conception (at the very least, everyone will just enjoy it). Well, if the heat is low or the coldness is irresistible, then you will get a girl. In short, the theory says: if you want an heir, you want more passion.
In fact, scientists have not yet established whether anything other than the usual chance affects the sex of the unborn child. However, in our opinion, Aristotle’s theory is very useful. As they say, if you don’t catch up, at least you’ll get warm!
Engraving by Lucas Kilian (1579-1637) “The second vision from the mirrors of the microcosm”
Engraving by Lucas Kilian (1579-1637) “The second vision from the mirrors of the microcosm”
- Flatulence promotes an erection
This is a really funny suggestion made by the Roman pharmacist Galen. He believed that increased gas formation inflates not only the abdomen, but also the penis. That’s why Galen recommended flatulence-inducing foods as an aphrodisiac. In particular, Galen was particularly in favor of beans, spices, and mustard. Now you know something unexpected about Roman orgies!
Jokes are jokes, but Galen’s councils were considered workers in Europe until the XVIII century! It was his recipes that were used, for example, at the court of the French kings. So the pleasures of the gallant age took place to about the same soundtrack as Roman orgies.โฆ
- Foot bandaging improves the quality of orgasms
You’ve probably heard about the Chinese tradition of foot bandaging. The girls’ feet were kept in a tight bandage from childhood, as a result of which they were deformed. Such legs were called “golden lotuses” and were considered a sign of refined feminine beauty. Only a man from a wealthy family could afford a wife with bandaged feet. After all, she could not move around normally, work around the house, which meant that she had to be fully provided for, carried on a stretcher and cherished as an artifact.
However, the women with bandaged legs were not completely immobilized. With a limp, they could move around the house and over short distances. Chinese doctors believed that the specific gait of a woman hobbling on her “golden lotuses” helps to train and strengthen her intimate muscles. Thus, foot bandaging was supposed to provide incredible pleasure to their owner, as well as her husband.
In practice, this theory was invented to justify the wild tradition. There is no evidence that lameness helps strengthen women’s intimate muscles. Kegel exercises, which are really designed for this, are based on completely different principles!
- Masturbation with oil is essential for successful sexual intercourse
The ancient Sumerians (by the way, the first urban civilization!) masturbation was considered an absolutely necessary practice for a normal sexual life. What Sumerian scientists wrote more than one tablet about!
Self-satisfaction was recommended for both men and women. At the same time, the Sumerian method involved the use of a special oil “puru”, which included crushed iron ore. Some Sumerian sources even claim that a man is unable to achieve a full erection without first rubbing his penis with the sacred oil puru.
Since humanity has been coping without puru oil for many millennia after that, we can safely assume that the Sumerian theory turned out to be incorrect. Althoughโฆ it would be interesting to try it with butter. Maybe what we think of as an erection would actually only elicit a sympathetic grin from the ancient Sumerians!
- The female orgasm is necessary for conception.
This theory was popular in England not so long ago โ in the XVI century, during the reign of the Virgin Queen Elizabeth. By the way, we can guess who was particularly zealous in promoting it and why. Of course, Elizabeth, who never married, is unlikely to have anything to do with this. But her numerous female subjects are almost certainly here. That’s what matriarchy brings!
A shot from the TV series “The Tudors”, 2007
A shot from the TV series “The Tudors”, 2007
Anyway, the theory was that a child is born from the union of male and female semen. And the female seed, like the male, is produced only during orgasm. Therefore, if you leave your wife unsatisfied, you will not see heirs like your ears.
Modern scientists recognize that there is such a phenomenon as female ejaculation, but they do not associate it in any way with the likelihood of conception. Unless a satisfied woman wants to make love to her partner more often, which means that the overall probability of conception increases. Damn, there was something to this Elizabethan theory after all!
- A lizard drowned in male urine relieves obsessive sexual desire
You know, it even seems to us that this is quite a working theory. Although modern scientists categorically deny any relationship between dead lizards and sexual arousal.
However, imagine being forced to drink an “anti-arousal” potion according to the recipe of the ancient scientist Pliny the Elder, which includes not only urine, but also that very lizard! Moreover, she must certainly drown, just throwing a dead reptile into the urine is not enough. You can hardly think about sex after that!
- Boys are conceived from the right testicle, and girls from the left
Our irrepressible naturalist Pliny the Elder enters the arena again. According to the venerable scientist, the sperm that promotes the conception of male children matures on the right side of the scrotum, and the female on the left. In general, Pliny was interested in the aspect of sex exclusively from the point of view of animal husbandry, so he recommended tying up the right testicle of sheep in order to stimulate the appearance of more sheep.
We don’t know what ancient animal breeders thought about this, but medieval doctors believed Pliny unconditionally. Therefore, the left side of the body has long been considered “feminine.” In the Middle Ages, it was believed that girls develop on the left side of their mother’s stomach, and boys develop on the right.
As you know, modern science completely refutes these bold theories. The only proven difference between the two sides of the scrotum is that the left testicle is usually located lower. But not always.